Monday, September 12, 2011

Funny Jon Stewart, Colbert React to Republican Debates

From Denny: Only Jon Stewart could dissect this crazy GOP line-up, revealing true agendas. When he goes after Michele Bachmann for her idea of mothering it sure is a left field what she says.

You expect her to comment on how raising five biological children and 23 foster children she would opine upon parenting skills in the area of how they needed lots of love and daily structure. Nope. What she says is "children need jobs." No kidding.

What I found most disheartening about her quote about children of poverty - from a over a year ago - is when she commented about how the poor should raise themselves up on their own, without government help - ever.

"Hunger is a great motivator." From that day forward I always wondered if she had starved any of those foster children to force them to do what she demanded.

Stewart goes on to show how John Huntsman is the only GOP candidate with a brain for calling the obvious, "For the Republican Party to remain viable we can't run from science (when 98 out of 100 believe evolution happened as theorized)." And so, Stewart brings on the obvious funny graphics, proving Huntsman as the GOP "Homo Unelectable" in the long line of homo sapiens and ancestors.

Ron Paul is the comic relief of the GOP field. He thinks the Mexican fence is not for keeping out those Mexicans. It's for keeping in the Americans. Ron Paul has more fun ideas for his presidency: Listen on! :)

Stewart has fun ribbing the commentators as if they were saying, "Gov. Perry, your state is full of steers and queers. Feel free to answer your questions with lots of punching."

In the second clip the media goes on to award Mitt Romney the win for the perceived two-man debate. Yes, there were eight people on stage but the other six were considered politically expendable.

I guess those are all the possible Vice President and administration choices for later is their Big Hope. Today, Gov. Bobby Jindal endorsed Gov. Rick Perry and Gov. Tim Pawlenty endorsed Mitt Romney. There sure are a whole lot of governors going on and not much governing.

Rick Perry called Social Security a Ponzi scheme. Everyone thinks that outrageous statement sure killed his chances of getting elected since most voters that actually take the trouble to vote are retirement age. Yet, GOP voters continually vote against themselves and support this crazy statement.

What was darker was when the audience cheered when Brian Williams asked about Texas has put to death 234 people. The audience went wild with support and cheers like it was a blood sport. Gov. Perry says he never lost sleep over killing them either - even if any were innocent. Talk about a chilling reaction to a chilling statement.

What was funny is how Romney tried to speak reasonably about a plan to get the economy going and then Perry comes along with the simple declarative statement, "I hate cancer!"

Jon Stewart made a declarative statement of his own, "Romney, you just got Rickrolled!" So, the brother media is wrong. According to Stewart, Rick Perry is the next president. He likens Perry to Tiger semen he is so strong and virile.

And then there's Colbert's comments about Labor Day, "It's when we put away our white pants and pull out our white candidates.... And all the media coverage until now has been bullsh*t."

The MSNBC debate was held at the Reagan Library, where, according to Colbert, "The candidates stood under Ronald Reagan's Air Force One plane that he used to personally pilot, steering with his balls."

What is truly strange is how when the candidates like Ron Paul were asked about eliminating the minimum wage, Paul replied, "Yes, eliminate it. It would help the poor."

And it's no wonder the media does not cover Paul's candidacy because of the dementia statements like this one. So, they cover Rick Perry who can say the same - but is more convincing?

*** 4 video clips to keep you laughing through the work week:

Thursday September 8, 2011
Indecision 2012 - The Great Right Hope
The GOP candidates fulfill the fifth pillar of Republicanism: the Hajj to the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library.

Thursday September 8, 2011
Oh My God, Rick Perry Is Going to Be Our Next President - Second Installment 
Republicans have a choice between a guy with a multipoint fact-based plan that he thinks will get the economy going and a guy who will punch cancer in the face.

Thursday September 8, 2011
Republican Presidential Debate Media Coverage
All the 2012 election media coverage until now has been bulls**t, but everything from here out is crucial, life-or-death stuff.

Thursday September 8, 2011
Rick Perry Presents
Rick Perry takes on the 800-pound gorilla in the room, being stomped on by the elephant in the room, being ridden by the emperor who has no clothes: Social Security.

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