Sunday, April 17, 2011

The Ridiculous: Funny Donald Trump Cartoons, Late Nite Jokes

From Denny:  OK, with a show of hands, who really thinks Trump is serious about running for President? Yeah, I agree with you. He's a complete clown no one would take seriously - except for the Republicans. Can you believe Trump last week's poll says he is  tied for first place for the GOP nomination? Just goes to show acting strange and exaggerated appeals to Republican voters who lost their minds long ago when they signed up on the Karl Rove-Bush's Brain Express.

The Donald Trump Exaggeration: his reality TV shows, the beauty queens, the weird hair and his gold-plated billionaire real estate empire.

It appears the Republicans are equally nonplussed as to the sudden show of The Donald for the nomination. Of course, ego-bloated windbags like Rush Limbaugh have to be jealous The Donald can suck more oxygen out of the room than they can so the sibling rivalry has started flinging from the playground:

"What is he doing? What is his objective? Could all this be some sort of sinister plot to split up the Republican vote? Some people think that he's actually running at the behest of Democrats."

In the end, Donald Trump is not running. Do you really think this overly private narcissistic and paranoid billionaire is going to open up his financial books to the public scrutiny? I doubt it.

This presidential run "noise" is more about publicity and running down Obama's image, trying to get traction for the Republicans. Of course, from the Republican strategists' point of view it helps to get really rich candidates to run for this office, especially when you have a really tough time raising big money. The hope is they will be as stupid as Meg Whitman and Carla Fiorina, spending millions of their own money on fruitless campaigns.

While reasonable people find The Donald ridiculous, one thing is for sure: the restlessness of the American voter. Absolutely no one is satisfied with what we are getting from both parties - or from Washington.

Expect to find lots of political surprises on both sides of the aisle come election day in 2012 as everyone will get turned out on their deaf ears. The real question is when the voters act will their new choices finally get the change and a better economy, putting America back to work, that everyone craves?

Donald Trump on Donald Trump:

On his failed marriages:  "It's very difficult for a woman to be married to me because I work," he said in an interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network. "I work all the time."

On his relationship with various voting blocks - like they are "things" not people - I find his attitude disturbing. It's like he's announcing for a sports network:  "I have a great relationship with the blacks," he said on Albany, N.Y., talk radio. "I've always had a great relationship with the blacks."

On his ideas about Muslims in America:  Where else but an interview on Fox News' "The O'Reilly Factor," Bill O'Reilly asked Trump, "Is there a Muslim problem in the world?"

"Absolutely," Trump said. "I don't know the Swedish people knocking down the World Trade Center."

On President Obama's citizenship. "He hasn't proven, he hasn't shown his birth certificate, he shows a piece of paper that has nothing to do with a birth certificate," Trump said in an interview with The Wall Street Journal.

To date President Obama has produced a certificate of live birth: go here.  The silly issue has been discredited and discounted months ago except by the bizarro political fringe groups who fixate on things which won't change the course of history. They know it's so strange that the media will give them news coverage.

Robert Ariail

Late Night Comedians' Opinion of The Donald: 

I've made a lot of jokes about Donald Trump running for president, but in all honesty, I'll be making a lot more. – David Letterman

Donald Trump said he can't make a final decision about whether he will run for president or not until this season of 'Celebrity Apprentice' is over. Which is maybe the best excuse from a guy who might run for the presidency ever — I am unable to decide on whether or not I will run for President until I decide whether Latoya Jackson or Jose Canseco will be my new Apprentice. – Jimmy Kimmel

Maybe he should ease into this — by running for a lower office first, like President of the Hair Club for Men. – Jimmy Kimmel

Trump said he can’t run because he has the #1 show on NBC. Which is kind of like having the nicest house in Haiti. – Jimmy Kimmel

If Donald Trump wins, my guess is America will look a lot like it did in 'Back to the Future 2,' when Biff was in charge. – Jimmy Kimmel

Trump is doing well in the polls. He's in second place among Republican voters. Among Tea Partiers, he's in first place. Although to be fair, in the Tea Party poll, Chuck Norris is in second place and third place is an AK-47. – Jimmy Kimmel

Donald Trump came in second place in a poll asking people who they want for president. I wouldn't get too excited. It was a poll of Democrats. – Craig Ferguson

Donald Trump is saying President Obama doesn’t have a birth certificate. Let’s just say he doesn’t. What are we going to do now? Make him go get one? – David Letterman

If Donald Trump loves America so much, why does he keep outsourcing the job of his wife? – Seth Meyers

Donald Trump announced he got his own segment every Monday morning on Fox News. Just what Fox News needs – another blonde airhead. – Bill Maher

Donald Trump showed his birth certificate to reporters. Who cares about his birth certificate? I want to know if that thing on his head has had its vaccinations. – Craig Ferguson

Donald Trump might be running for president and he just released his birth certificate. It lists his eyes as 'blue' and his hair as 'ridiculous.' – Conan O'Brien

Donald Trump called George W. Bush 'the worst president in the history of the United States.' Then he added, 'Until, of course, I'm elected.' – Conan O'Brien

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.' – Lewis Black

Stupid presidents, smart presidents, white presidents, black presidents - doesn't work! What this country needs is a crazy Third World dictator. And Donald Trump has what it takes to be that. He's already got a plane with his name on it, solid gold buildings, a harem... – Lewis Black

A new poll shows that Donald Trump could beat President Obama in 2012. The poll was taken by Trump Polls International. – Conan O'Brien

Jerry Holbert

Clay Bennett

Jerry Holbert

Drew Sheneman

Jerry Holbert

Jerry Holbert

Nick Anderson

Dana Summers

Mike Luckovich

Chan Lowe

Mike Luckovich

*** Photo by Mike Stobe @ Getty Images

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