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| Photo Credit: Evan Vucci/AP |
From Denny: Now First Lady Michelle Obama is accused of being the archetypal "angry black woman" for daring to stare down and get in the face of an inept protester who just thought the First Lady would tolerate her rudeness. Where do people get these ideas about how this was a racist heckling incident with white entitlement overtones?
Well, never to be a shrinking violet from controversy on my blog, let's start with the "angry black woman" stereotype. Guess what; historically there's good reason for it as black women have taken a boat load of garbage from society for generations. That fight for survival attitude would be ingrained by now culturally or none of their mothers would have lived to give birth to the generations to follow. After more than 40 years of civil rights legislation, slowly climbing up the social ladders, admittance into the best universities and procuring high level jobs, the "angry black woman" stereotype is no longer as necessary. Yet, the resentments still linger - on both sides of racism.
But here's the rub about this nasty exchange of a lesbian gay rights activist heckling the First Lady who is black: it's really about American female culture and a lot less about black intolerance of white entitlement issues.
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What?! you say? Let me share a thought with you: I'm as white as they come. I've encountered plenty of reverse racism incidents over the years even before I opened my mouth to speak one word, most especially from black women, just because of the way I look. I've even had friendlier professional black women tell me how they would love to be best friends and then say, "But why do you have to be white?!" To which I replied, "Hey, girl, this is as good as it gets since that's how God planted me on this planet."
While I understood their reservations and inability to "cross that line" I figured it was their loss of loyal friendship. Since then the majority of my best friends have always proven to be some very cool men as I grew impatient waiting for other women to grow up and learn the value of friendship instead of competition.
I never waste time informing reverse racists I've fought for their civil rights since I was ten years old. I just let them wallow in their hate and illusions without verbally answering the fight. Instead, I just follow the higher example of a truly Christian South Carolina black woman who taught me as a child how to handle racists: pray Peace to settle their spirits - and move on emotionally. I certainly witnessed plenty of racism up close and personal to understand the situation truthfully. Miss Annie Ruth was a class act.
I'm so fair-skinned I have to wear a 50 level sunscreen and a hat just to walk to the mailbox in the summer, a 70 level when I can find it, my skin is so fair and my eyes so Celtic blue they are always protected behind sunglasses. Hell, my blond fair-skinned father couldn't even get a mild tan, just burned like a lobster and then turned pale again. Lucky me my mother's side sported a great grandmother from Spain even though she too was blonde and blue eyed but at least she could tan a little.
Did the First Lady do wrong? Was her response an overreaction? Frankly, even as a white woman I would have done exactly the same thing as First Lady Michelle Obama in this situation. Answering common disrespect and rudeness is not an "angry black woman" attitude. It's every woman's attitude. The First Lady had every right to be disgusted at her public treatment. She is not an elected official; she is the wife of one, the President in this case. Therefore, she and her children are not fair game for activists or political strategists in my book.
Here's the real and hot simmering issue that has gone on for generations and is now boiling over: Women all over the world are frustrated and furious with societal disrespect and getting devalued in the work place and at home with their husbands and/or children. Here in America the female culture is just plain nasty because women really do not care about or respect other women.
American women waste far too much energy on hating other women they perceive as more beautiful or wealthier or higher status or downgrading overweight women as ugly in their competition for male attention. So many choose to remain emotionally immature and spiritually undeveloped all their lives, sidelined by self-imposed imaginary competitions. Guess what; men like average looking women as much as beautiful ones, and, yes, even fat women are desired and loved by men. Men like women who touch their hearts. It just adds icing to the cake if the women also happen to be polished looking because it's a fact of life that everyone enjoys eye candy.
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For the past 40 years, ever since feminism roared to life, American women are still mired in fighting the Mommy wars against career women, each demographic vying to trounce the other as less valued and declared as subhuman. That's why women's groups to advance serious subjects for women like equal pay, workplace conditions and health have rarely succeeded the past 40 years. American women are too busy fighting each other instead of pulling together to help each other - as African-Americans figured out how to do successfully.
What was sad about this heckling incident is that a female gay rights activist attacked another woman, a fellow liberal who supports gay rights and whose political party is the only one to advance gay rights. So why was this gay woman preaching to the choir? What was her strategy or did she even possess one? Or was she really only registering just how worthless and devalued she believes society in general makes her feel because she is a member of the small percentage of non-heterosexuals in this country - or just maybe she feels devalued because she is a woman?
It's a real brain scratcher for long term logic when a person witnesses how women all over the globe unwittingly or purposefully teach their male and female children to devalue women in society because they feel devalued. It does make us wonder if the worst misogynists are, well, fellow women.
Isn't it time for women all over the globe to quit harassing each other and pull together to create "the change we want to see in the world"? I'm putting out the call. Who will join me?
Crown your life with Peace!
* * * Please support Warriors Pearl Foundation - contributing to fund efforts to help homeless female military veterans come home. Visit Denny Lyon Gifts @ CafePress.com - see what's new! And a special thanks to those of you supporting this effort! You rock!
* * * Please support Warriors Pearl Foundation - contributing to fund efforts to help homeless female military veterans come home. Visit Denny Lyon Gifts @ CafePress.com - see what's new! And a special thanks to those of you supporting this effort! You rock!
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